New York City's homeless are lazier than they have ever been.
"I remember when the homeless of New York had, I don't know, a certain je ne sais quoi" said Jennifer Skately, 24, of Washington Heights. "They'd at least crack wise, do a little dance, or just take pride in earning the 21 cents you'd half-heartedly fish out of your pocket. Now it seems like they expect you to give 'em a buck for nothing else than being homeless."
Sittin' around, doin' nothin' - as usual
Quantitatively, it does appear that Ms. Skately's anecdote can be supported.
In a broad range of categories, it appears that the homeless are trying less hard than ever. All-time low marks were earned in entertainment, creativity, and good humor. Marks for aggravation, conniving, and public urination have bottomed out as well. The only statistic in which they receive a better mark is "sitting around and doing absolutely fuck-all."
Get up and get a job? Not this guy!
Henry LaFontaine, spokesman for the Center, chimes in:
"It seems that after 9/11, the average vagrant's desire to improve his or her lot in life just vanished. Some may chalk it up to a crushing loss of hope, attributable to prolonged homelessness. On the other hand, maybe since garbage pickup has been reduced to twice a week they're all better-fed these days? I really couldn't tell you. Nonetheless, I am afraid that the homeless, more than ever, just seem shiftless, bored, and unbelievably lazy."
I spoke with "Joe" (not his real name) to find out his side of the story.
"Man, you go on the Subway and they look at you like you done [had intercourse with] their kids. It's tough to find a [friendly] face. And now, with the new mayor not making us go to a shelter at night, it just seems like the other bums got all lazy and [what have you]."
Joe then leaned back against the wall and got comfortable.
Joe, comfortable
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